a little about me...

 I have recently (last 2 years) had a bit of a life changing occurrence - resulting in me realising what is really important in life. Believe it or not it’s not whether you stay really late at work or reply to that 12am email, it’s also not whether you have a thigh gap or a high tight ass (although that would be nice) it’s the things that make you smile. the kind of smile you have that stretches right inside you and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy (like needing a wee but nicer) its having the people (and animals) around you to keep you smiling that way, and if they don't, then don't waste your smiles on them.

It’s about enjoying every moment and being who you want to be not who everyone else wants you to be.

 It all sounds so cheeseball huh... and yeah, it probably is, but like I just said, I couldn't actually care a doddle!

My life was nearly cut short and I refuse to waste any more of my precious time doing things that I don't enjoy or with people that I don't enjoy.  So, therefore, with that in mind, here is a little bit about me...

I like the smell of tetra fish flakes and munching on those fake hot dog sausages from a tin (5% meat content is still meat people) I like eating lunch on my own with my book, I like thinking about volunteering but never actually getting round to doing it. I like sponsoring my 3 dogs that I’m not allowed to go and see because they're too damn violent and kill other, smaller things. I like a freezing cold bedroom and a warm bed, I like American TV dramas where everything centralises on America being the best nation in the world, being under attack but then winning the day with a slight 5 second glimpse to the rest of the world. I love old movies where ladies were ladies, men were gentlemen and love was romantic.

I love my friends, all of them, I have known most of them for way longer than any of us care to remember (or admit) and I know that it will be that way forever now. Others have come and gone - the true ones have stayed and I couldn't be luckier with my lot.

(I just wished they/I lived closer...!)

I’m learning to love my bum.

I love my family, they are officially the best family in the world – they have their issues, don’t get me wrong but they are perfect to me, because they loved me even when I had black hair with red streaks and looked slightly like Rosie Webster In Coronation Street when she went all gothic and emo, we are a very small family but a very happy family, I am proud when I am with every single member, and would do anything for any of them. (That’s the Welsh in me..!)

 

I love the 5 finger rule and enlightening people on how it works. (Ask if you want to know but this has sorted me out on more than one occasion and I am happy to show you what to do and how it can cure any bad mood)

I love winning, I hate losing, I love thinking about winning and then I love the smell of a competition. I see pretty much everything as a competition, I start to itch if I know I can potentially win at something (they make creams for that) I love being right all of the time, even when I’m blatantly wrong I like to think I have a knack of making people see my point of view.

Once, when I was at school, I held the title of “fastest girl in Hereford” I was racing in the 100m race for county and I started to lose… I could see I was going to come second and so I pulled up with a “bad ankle” the shame – I feel better now I have that off my chest, but I just couldn’t lose. My mum saw straight through it though, she’s so wise. (Evil genius)

I love playing card games and board games with my Nan and Pops in their breakfast room and shouting “donkey” at Pops because he loses at Ludo and, much like me, almost tips the board upside down in a huff,

I like spending money, I don’t like then realising I have none because I’m wearing it all 3 days into pay day but then I have a countdown to the next one so I can learn to do my weekly shop on £20.. (It is possible)

I like to drink a nice wine and eat nice food. I also like parsley sauce, a lot. Sometimes there’s nothing better than a big old greasy burger with the latest Heat magazine and come dine with me on the TV though, as much as I like dressing up I am a huge fan of pyjamas. Whatever time of the day.

I have a new, slightly odd but only mild obsession with sausages. Real ones (as well as the fake ones) now I have finally learned to cook them

I love Lewis Carroll and have moments where I think I may once have been Alice. –I collect Alice in Wonderland and any Lewis Carroll book, my big bookcase is full of them, yes, the same story over and over again – sometimes when I’m down I read them and they cheer me up.  I love a good cup of builder’s tea in the garden – the stronger the better.

 

I love all animals, except cows. I don’t really have anything against them but I think in a former life I was killed riding a cow across a train crossing as I also have an irrational fear of them too. (and toothpaste)

I like high shoes and a good dance but I prefer high shoes and a table to sit at with friends.  I like the old cliché of being outside in the rain, I like getting ready for a party listening to terrible cheesy music.

I love ducks even though they have a vendetta against me, they really do. It is my lifelong mission to make ducks love me, I will keep plugging away at them in the vain hope one day they will reward me (not sure if ducks are aware of the concept of reward but hey ho)

I love my doggy Louis, he was born with a gammy leg but it only makes me love him more, he had a whole life before me which I don’t think about, I just know that since he came to be with me he has made my little life so much better, sometimes I think he smiles at me. Actually, I think it’s just wind.

My mum is my best friend and the best mother I could ever ask for. I can never win an argument or pretend to be anything other than my annoying self around her as she knows me better than anyone. She’s a treasure and I am so proud of her.

Once, when I was about 12, I had short hair like a boy, and even though I was wearing a pink coat, a girl asked me out thinking I was a boy. This has stayed with me as one of the more embarrassing moments of my life. I blame my mum for the haircut I then went on to have 6 perms in a row and ended up looking like a Fraggle for most of the 90’s

Nobody in my family will play board games with me because I get so angry, my mum thinks she’s Donald Frigging Trump when she’s on the monopoly board and it winds me up, her and my brother gang up on me because they want to see me cry.. It usually works. I’m pathetic

I love my roomie – Boffy (other names include Walt/Dwight/Jim). I think I'm now too old to call him my boyfriend, so "roomie" will do for now. I waited a very long time to feel this happy with somebody else and I am not letting him go for anything! (I hope) he loves me for being just me, plain boring old, happy to stay in and cwtch, me. I think he is the kindest, nicest person I have ever met and I tell him that all the time. Even if we had never got together I would still think that. He is a diamond and I count myself as very lucky.

I love Sunflowers, Daffodils and Tulips.

I have the hands of a 90 year old and I hate my toenails, I once auditioned for x-factor and didn’t make it past round 1 (this is not the TV stage in case you wondered, there are about 4 rounds before you meet the judges so I didn’t even get to see Dannii Minogue and lust after her dress) basically I was crap but one of the producers liked my shoes so all was not lost.

One day I will grow something and eat it – that’s my goal (in a very Shayne Ward type way) until then I will always be the crap, impatient woman who forgets to water things and then they die…

I am so happy with my lot, if this is all I have forever then I will be a very lucky person - I have nothing to be sad about as long as everyone around me is healthy and happy and I am still here. That's what I have learnt in the last 2 years, people spend far too much of their short lives moaning and being sad and doing things that don't make them happy. I won't be that person.

Sometimes it takes a huge life event to make you realise you don't need to go chasing rainbows because the rainbows were right in front of your eyes all along.

I love Christmas

I hate snow – bah humbug